Letting it go…

One of the questions that many people ask us is, “what about your stuff?”  It is a curiosity for some and a critical question for others.  When we tell them that we are letting it go, we often get a look of uncertainty. I imagine that their uncertainty comes mainly from two perspectives: 1) they are uncertain that we made a wise choice, and 2) they are uncertain of what that really means.  When we say we are letting it go, we mean that we either sold, gave away, donated or sadly trashed the large majority of the things that we owned.

For those of you thinking we are crazy 🙂 I will assure you that we kept a few things.

  • Our Subaru – originally I had planned to sell that car in Houston or Austin, but Amy convinced me to keep it.  Amy’s parents generously offered to keep it and manage it for us while we are gone.
  • Photos, valuable books, our camping gear, small family heirlooms and any clothes that weren’t at the end of their useful life already – these items went mainly into Amy’s sister’s basement in a stack about 6’x6’x6′.
  •  A few kitchen necessities – things like a few knives, a pot and pan, and a couple other small implements. These also went into the same stack in our sister’s basement.
  • The kids furniture – my mother just bought a new house and has put this into a kids room there. Assuming we don’t end up living in a yurt when we come back we will likely retrieve them.

This is also probably the part that is the hardest for many to come to terms with. Often the next question is, “Won’t you need all that other stuff when you get back?”  This is a tough one for sure…the simple answer is maybe.  Do I really need a garlic press, three types of blenders, two types of mixers or a myriad of ultra specialized things? Perhaps we will come back and repurchase all that and more, but I think the reality might be somewhere in between.  Our life was a constant press to acquire more and more things that took up more and more space. And the more space we had, the more time it was taking to not only manage the space (mow, trim, garden, paint, repair, remodel, clean, etc.), but also to pay for it all (more time at work). It is somewhat ironic that we then buy more stuff in an effort to make the added tasks easier and less time consuming. In fact, Amy and I were considering buying a bigger house this spring when we realized we were simply perpetuating a vicious cycle.  Worse, we felt like we may have been inadvertently teaching our kids to place too much value on the material things in our lives.

Now I am not saying that getting rid of everything is the only solution to this problem, nor does one need to travel the world for a year. For us however, it felt like a way to break the cycle and truly take a new approach in our lives. As Amy likes to put it, “we are hitting the reset button.”  Step one, remove the material constraints that were inhibiting us from taking this leap. Step two, take advantage of the time and the newly freed resources to explore more of what is out there.  At minimum we have a fairly unique experience to look back on and hopefully find new opportunities with our changed perspective.  As an added bonus (except when the four of us are all piled into one bed) we get to spend some serious quality time together.

As we travelled from the Front Range, we slowly discarded a few more items. Some old clothes we had brought for camping, a box of toys and kids books given to a nephew, an old tent on its last leg, and some car ride friendly kids activities.  Our original plan had us getting down to two large backpacks for Amy and I, two small packs for the kids and two small carry-on packs for Amy and I.  For the kids education and support we chose to add a bag late in the game and are now carrying a small duffel (carry-on size) filled with school workbooks and some school supplies.  I am still hopeful we can shed a few more items in the future to lighten our load, for as of now we are packed to the brim.  Sherry asked us if we would like her selfie stick to take with us as we left Tucson…I told her no, “it would mean getting rid of underwear at this point.”

When we were in Phoenix I made one more leap in letting it go: I buzzed my hair for the first time.  I had been thinning for years and much like the other things in my life I couldn’t let it go.  But I felt like it was time, this shaving would be a symbol for me of the transformation we were about to undergo.  It is taking some getting used to, but I think it was the right decision. See for yourself:

Arizona – Some like it hot

I am way overdue on this post…I have been struggling writing this post for weeks.  Not because we didn’t enjoy our time there, quite the contrary really, but more that there are a million ways I could have/should have gone with it.  IMG_1352Arizona has always been a special place for Amy and I.  It is not so much the place, but the people.  Let’s be honest, 9 months of the year it is hot as hell in Southern Arizona.  Driving in I was sure the soles of my shoes would melt to the pavement.

The drive south from Flagstaff is a slow descend into the Salt River Valley.   The landscape inevitably changes from pine forests, to high desert piñon forests, to the harsher lowland desert valley that dominates the area.  In addition to the change in scenery, you notice that every 1000 feet in elevation change is marked by not only a sign, but also a significant jump in the temperatures. At 7000 ft. the temp was about 82°F/28°C, 6000 ft. – 87°F/31°C, 5000 ft. – 90°F/32°C, 4000 ft. – 93°F/34°C, 3000 ft. – 97°F/36°C, 2000 ft. – 102°F/39°C…Phoenix is sometimes referred to as the Valley of the Sun and I began to wonder if people called it this because it is similar to standing on the surface of the sun.  At a little over 1000 ft, the temp hit 108°F/42°C (remember, this was early October).  

My Uncle Todd moved to Arizona many years ago to connect with the love of his life Sherry. In many ways I view Todd more as my brother than my uncle, but even that doesn’t properly describe our relationship.  Todd was my best man, he is one of my closest friends and he is family.  This closeness began long ago and was strengthened after I dropped out of high school.  I went to live with Todd in San Diego.  Todd was a bar manager at a downtown hotspot and got me a job as a busboy.  It was a transformative time in my life and it helped forge a bond with Todd that goes beyond uncle/nephew.

Once Todd moved to Tucson, I started visiting frequently.  One summer, after Amy and I started getting serious, I went to stay with them for a while.  My job was to paint their house (I probably didn’t do that great of a job) and then later Todd, Sherry and I would head to San Francisco together for the 4th of July.  It was a great trip and some of my favorite stories stretch back to that summer.  During that time Todd and Sherry got to know Amy (Amy here: I received a very funny phone call from Sherry while they were all together and immediately knew they would be people I would like) and they immediately approved.  Much like them, I am grateful for their support and excitement as we embark on this next year.

Arizona is also the location of the first major family event Amy attended with me.  There she met my Great Grandpa Brown, my Grandfather and it was also the first time she met Todd and Sherry in person.  We often travelled back to Tucson to visit and later Todd, Sherry, Amy and I took several trips together.  They were some of the most enjoyable travel experiences we had ever had.  Needless to say, Amy and I were very excited to head down to see not only them, but my wonderful cousin Colette and her growing family.  We arrived in Phoenix on Colette’s birthday and just barely missed seeing Todd and Sherry.  Thinking back, we didn’t do much on Colette’s birthday…I think the only gift we got her was watching Connor  so she could shower and nap (for all you non parents this ends up being all you really want when you have a baby). (Amy again: we gave her a bottle of wine from the Palisade Winefest)

Colette’s house was a godsend for us (except when the shower door exploded in my face).IMG_1192 Colette has learned well from her parents, she was a fantastic hostess and made us feel right at home.  We ate well, swam in her awesome pool, and played with the newest Martin/ Greenwalt: Connor.  This little guy was quite a treat and brought back many memories of time with our kids.  While we were there, he started the first stages of crawling, gave us a ton of great smiles and entertained the girls.

We did venture out of the house a few times, a visit to one of the many splash parks IMG_1345(great way to beat the heat), the art museum (good spot to teach the girls about Art History), spending some time at the local children’s museum, seeing the theatrical performance “Annie” (girls are still singing the songs weeks later) and visiting the Tucson Tamale Company (you have probably never had tamales like these, my favorite is the either the Tucson or the Green Corn).

Todd and I spent hours talking about opportunities and the possibilities that might be realized through this adventure Amy and I are making.  I love his eyes-open perspective; he is always looking for the positive side of a situation or adding humor to a moment that might be too serious otherwise.  Todd was also the barber who shaved my head and immediately after completing it he started talking about doing it too.  When Sherry asked him if he was serious, he said, “It’s either this or a tattoo!”  Two days later, I shaved his head for the first time in his adult life.  Now that is solidarity!test

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